(or: Stoya vs. Lady Porn Day Part 2: The Twat Talk Just Keeps On Comin’)

“Stoya’s experience is that the porn industry cares about what her body – including her vagina – looks like because of production value. That I understand: if the vagina was the bedroom of a house, each wall should be painted, the floor should be finished, the glass installed in the windows and a door frame put in place. Each vagina – and cock, and anus, and mouth – should look finished and clean.
However, mainstream porn – and the cosmetic industry, and mainstream media – has gone further than that. They’ve homogenized vaginas into a single “preferred” look that screams pre-pubescence: tight, light-colored and completely hairless labia, with a bare pubic mound (okay, sometimes there’s a liiiiittle tuft) and a bleached anus. Not only must the bedroom be “finished and clean,” but every window should be square, every door made from the same wood, every wall painted beige.”

-Reply by Jennifer Nicole via the Demoiselles

Uh… hey ladies… I kind of really hate to break this to you… but I work in mainstream porn. Digital Playground, the company that I’ve been with for the entirety of my hardcore career, they’re about as mainstream as you can get.

They’re everywhere. I can’t walk down the street in a major metropolitan area without seeing my face (or butt cheeks) in the window of an adult store. That Pirates movie was cut into a softcore flick and Blockbuster carries it. When Vivid still had a booth at the Adult Entertainment Expo, Digital Playground’s was sandwiched between them and Hustler.

Google ‘em real quick. Digital Playground is the company that launched Jesse Jane and Tera Patrick. That very same mainstream porn company sends someone running outside with an umbrella if they see me wander into the harsh LA sunlight on set. They don’t want me beige. DP’s main director, Robby D., is the one that got me to grow my pubic hair out in the first place.

Aside from my desire to defend the company that I’ve directly worked for and can speak from personal experience on, there really is plenty of pubic hair in porn, a variety of labia sizes/shapes, and a reasonable amount of different vulva colorings. I’m starting to wonder how you arrived at the opinion that this pre-pubescent pudenda look is so prolific in the adult industry.

Oh, and thanks for posting that sweet photo of my sweet outfit from AVN this year, but I only made the skirt. The top is a vintage Vivienne Westwood ebay find. I should really re-check that post and see if my wording is misleading or unclear.

I am a porn star.

I am a lady that makes porn.

I hear a lot from women about how they are uncomfortable with their vaginas. They wonder if it looks right, smells right, is the right color, shape, size, proportionate, if their labia stick out too much (or even not enough).

I hear that they appreciate my comfort with my own protruding labia and take it as validation that they don’t need a hairless “coin slot” vulva where everything is all tucked in in order to be attractive.

It’s nice to hear that ladies like my body and like that I run around with no clothing on sometimes, but seriously, you need to understand something.

Dudes do not give a fuck.

I’m focusing on female/male sexual interaction here because men that only have sex with men have reasons for not wanting to touch your pretty lap flower that have nothing to do with its scent or aesthetic value, and I really hope that women who have sex with women are already openly down with the fact that pussies come in a wide and beautiful array of looks, feels and smells.

But seriously, dudes that are into chicks don’t give a fuck.

Porn dudes don’t give a fuck.

Dudes that I have sexual things to do with in my off time do not give a fuck.

I don’t give a fuck either. Personally, if I am touching the vagina of someone I find attractive, I am much more focused on joy that I am touching it and figuring out what the best way to make it orgasm is.

I’m pretty sure I missed #ladypornday on rabbitwrite.com. That’s fine because the only days for me that aren’t lady-porn-days are usually rhinestone-something-within-an-inch-of-its-life-and-practice-removing-it-gracefully days or lay-around-with-little-clothing-on-and-discuss-sex days, which are really only semantically different. I think anything that encourages more of an open discussion and dialogue about sexuality is wonderful. I did, however, feel the need to respond to something written by The Demoiselles for #ladyporn day. In the piece, the writer says

“Because looks are everything when someone’s about to give you an orgasm.
…well, okay, maybe in porn they are.”

and I just can’t let that go without replying to it. On the porn sets that I have been on, the director, production company, camera guy, etc. care what the vaginas look like. They care for the same reason that a contractor might leave a light switch plate off in his own home but really ought to make sure every detail of a home they are building for someone else is perfect. We are producing a product and every detail should have the highest production value possible.

But the male talent? They don’t care. They get paid to have fun with the most meticulously groomed ladies available to the adult industry, and (in my experience) even if you’re having sex with them off set just for fun they don’t give a flying rats ass what kind of half grown out razorburned disaster area you’ve got going on in your crotch as long as it doesn’t look diseased and you’ve taken a shower recently. Even then, the shower might be negotiable.

Men outside of the porn industry that I’ve had sex with don’t care. There was one who couldn’t stand to look at the bloody mess that period sex created because he associated all that blood with somehow hurting me, but if a towel was down and the lights were off, it didn’t matter at all. Men in my personal life don’t expect me to be perfectly groomed, over glossed and decked out in fake eyelashes, nor do they expect the C cup breasts that I appear to have on my box covers.

Please… get to know your vagina. Find out what it looks like in various states of arousal. Find out what it smells like over the course of your monthly cycle. Get in there with a mirror and a speculum and really get to know it. Whatever it does is right for it, and the only time you should be concerned is when your Gynecologist is or if it’s doing something out of character. Don’t let a sexual partner tell you something that’s normal for your body is gross or wrong. If they do, don’t let them back until they’re ready to deal with the reality of sex.

But seriously. Dudes… they aren’t really known for noticing details. They usually don’t give a fuck.